Christian living Archives | Page 4 of 11

How to Survive a Spiritual Landmine

August 12, 2016 by jstults 6 Comments

Suddenly the day that was going so well, the life that was on track, falls to pieces.

You’ve stepped on a spiritual landmine. Now you’re in survival mode…

If you’re reading these words here today, then I’m sure you’ve experienced it – the spiritual landmine.

It’s a blast that rocks your world when you least expect it. The spiritual landmine may be small, just enough to blow smoke in your face and sting your eyes – a temporary frustration – or it may be catastrophic: a death, a financial disaster, legal issues, major illness, a terrible accident.

Whether big or small, the spiritual landmine can have the same effect: to rob you of your joy and victory in Christ. How do you survive when your whole world shifts?

How do you carry on when life gets tough? When you feel caught off guard?

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The Spiritual Landmine Set-up

It’s nights like this when we’re still transitioning to Daddy’s second-shift job, so this mama is taking care of all the homework, all the practices, all the kid needs and pet needs and food needs.

All. The. Things.

And of course, nothing goes smoothly. We can’t find all of the shin guards, and supper is rushed, and we don’t even know where the middle boy’s practice will be yet.

Nevertheless, the mama and the kiddos make it to soccer practice on time, and after practice is over, they make it home safely again.

Just as they pull in the driveway, she dares to think for one second that maybe this won’t be so bad. She can handle this second-shift switch.

She has the Lord with her and in her, and with His help, she is able!

Then it comes, the attack.

The kids disobey repeatedly one right after the other, requiring discipline and delaying bedtime; the dog eats food from someone’s plate, and then, the straw that breaks the mama’s back, the dog poops. Inside the house.

And this mama, she’s sorely tempted to throw a little temper tantrum. A few silent tears leak down her face as she wavers between right and wrong.

But instead of giving up, she cries, “Mercy! Have mercy on me Lord.” Because in a matter of seconds, she’s been reminded of how great her need is, how easily she is prone to sin.

I can’t, Lord. I just can’t, she silently pleads….

Read the rest about how to survive a spiritual landmine here at my friend Rebekah Hallberg’s blog!

Sharing with: http: Grace and Truth

Why You Need to Take a Leap of Faith ~ and a Giveaway!

May 3, 2016 by jstults 11 Comments

Sometimes, … no quite often, God asks us to do things that make us incredibly uncomfortable. And like the shy kid who hates reading in front of the class, we have a choice to make.

Will we follow, take the leap of faith?

Or will we back away from the edge in fear and miss our chance to really soar?

The Father has been sending me quite the message about fear lately, and I know He’s sending some of you that same message, too.

Fear not.

It’s the same message from three years ago when I typed out my first public confession here in this space. You see, I thought that blogging would be a less terrifying, safer way to obey the Lord in using this gift of writing for His glory. I think about that now and just laugh because there is nothing less scary or safe about writing about the hard things in life.

There’s nothing safe about writing how you sometimes feel unloved, or you sometimes fail at loving others. There’s nothing safe about writing out your own sin for the whole world to read.

Listen to me, friends, there’s nothing safe about sharing your story, whatever it might be, but there’s nothing quite as beautiful either because when you do, you get to hear “me, too” and “I needed that” and “thank you.” You find out there are so many other work-in-progress women out there in the world who struggle through the same life lessons as you.

You learn that while you set out to encourage and exhort others through this thing called writing, your Father set out to encourage and exhort you.

But the most beautiful part?

You get to take part in God’s story.

That’s why you need a faith that leaps because when we obey, when we take that risk of being foolish for the sake of Christ, we join in the work of reaching others for His Name. And there is nothing more difficult yet infinitely more rewarding than that, is there?

Is it worth it, this leap of faith?

Yes, a thousand times yes.

It’s worth it, friends.

That hard thing He wants you to do? That person you need to talk to? That story you need to share? That sin you need to confess? That future that He wants you to leap in to?

Take the leap, friend.

And I’m not talking about the feel-good, positive-vibes leap of faith in yourself. I’m not talking about the dream-your-own-dreams, you-can-do-it, make-your-own-destiny kind of leap.

I’m talking about the leap of faith that asks you to deny yourself and take up your cross. The leap of faith that scares the pants off of you because you’re fairly certain you are not capable on your own. The leap of faith that is only possible because you serve the God of the impossible.

Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, andtake up his cross and follow Me.” Mt. 16:24 (NASB)

I’m talking about a leap of faith with its object and focus as the Creator of the Universe, the God who holds you in the palm of His hand, the One who will never leave you nor forsake, who plans to prosper you and not to harm you.

Take that leap of faith, friend.

To do otherwise is to willfully choose disobedience.

“And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.” Heb. 11:6 (NASB)

Choose faith and find yourself in awe of the Lord who works in and through you!

Jen 🙂

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It was a big week for Being Confident of This!

The facebook page reached 1,000 likes earlier last week, and with the Father’s help (because many, many times I wanted to just quit), we also passed the three-year mark here at the blog. So, to celebrate this blogiversary and God’s faithfulness, let’s have a giveaway of some of my favorite Christian living resources! You won’t say no to that, right? 😉

What I’m giving away to the winner:

By This Name by John Cross

This is our preferred Creation-to-Christ resource for strengthening anyone’s understanding of the Bible as a whole. It is our go-to tool for evangelism, discipleship, and so forth.

Every Wife’s Choice by Sarah Fairchild

My favorite resource for every marriage (and not just because it’s written by my talented sister)! Sarah delves into the greek roots of the famous First Corinthians 13 passage on love to reveal truths about the choices we have in loving our husbands. Packed with humorous anecdotes, this read will both challenge and encourage you as a wife.

Praying the Promises of the Cross by Arabah Joy

I had the privilege of working on the graphics for this printable prayer journal (pdf version). Each day contains a brief yet powerful devotional reading about the promises of the cross, a scripture to read and write out, and a section to write out your own prayer.

Philippians 1:6 Printable from me

This 8×10 print will remind you of your work-in-progress status and the hope you have in Christ to one day be complete! Be sure to hang it where you will see it often. 🙂

Okay, time to enter – and don’t forget to share this around so your friends can enter, too!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

*Being Confident of This makes use of affiliate links. For more information, please see the homepage. Thank you for helping to support this blog!

Sharing with: Grace and Truth, Faith Filled Friday, Coffee for Your Heart

The Secret to Being a Warrior Wife

April 28, 2016 by jstults 14 Comments

He shuffled into the living room, shoulders slumped, and with a great sigh lowered himself to the couch. His clothes bore the marks of a man who worked hard for a living.

He could barely meet my gaze, as if he were somehow lacking or not enough. I knew he needed my compassion and encouragement, but instead of sympathy, I felt only frustration.

After all, I thought, I’m working hard in this season, too. I’m weary, too. What do I have left to offer? It feels like too much, and I have nothing left to give.

Besides, he’s a grown man. I’m busy caring for children and our home all day long, on top of the demands of work and ministry roles that I am responsible for. If I can keep myself going, why can’t he keep himself going?

And just like that I missed the opportunity to be a warrior wife.

Have you ever been so caught up in the busyness and stress of life that you forget who you are or who you were created to be, friend?

Especially as a writer and pastor’s wife, I struggle with balancing my family and home life with the demands of ministry life. Without realizing it, I begin to neglect important relationships because I’m “just so busy.”

I become task-oriented rather than people-oriented, a slave to the to-do list rather than a Spirit-led woman.

And it’s downright frustrating how quickly and easily I slip into this mode of doing rather than being!

At a recent women’s conference, I received a wake-up call from the Lord. One speaker in particular, Dana James, reminded us of who we are created to be as daughters of the one true King in relation to our husbands.

My friend Dana shared with us that God designed us to be “helpers” from the very beginning.

“Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’ ” Gen. 2:18

Yes, I know we’ve all heard this verse before. Our job is to help, right? That’s our God-given “role,” right?

Wrong!

Dana drew our attention to the original language, which uses the Hebrew word ezer (pronounced ay-zer). The word ezer is used 21 times in the Old Testament, but the majority of those uses are in reference to God himself, His character. In such cases, the word ezer is used in connection with words like shield, sword, deliverer, mighty, and hope.

**Thus, ezer refers to the warrior aspect of God’s character – the One who fights on our behalf, our Shield and Defender, our Rescue.**

As I looked further into the meanings attached to this word and its definitions, I found connotations of assistance or aid, especially in times of suffering or distress. It means relief given to someone in need, removing or reducing something that is painful, unpleasant, or even oppressive!

And this very same word ezer is used to describe a helper suitable for Adam.

Do you see what this means for us, my sisters in Christ?

When the Lord God chose to create woman, He instilled in her very character the properties of this ezer. He created us to be warrior women, warrior wives, who will bravely fight spiritual battles on behalf of our husbands, who will provide aid and relief to the men in our lives who are worn down and discouraged by the demands of this earthly life.

Here’s the rub: I think we all know this intuitively and most of us truly desire to live this out.

But sometimes it feels like a whole lot of work that we have no strength to do, doesn’t it?

So when I saw my hard-working husband down and out on a day when I was already in that weighed-down place myself, I chose to look the other way. I chose to put my needs first.

I left him without his ezer, his helper.

It was a selfish choice that I’m ashamed to say I make often when I’m already stressed. And I wonder, why do I make this choice? What is it that feels so hard about being a warrior wife? What secret am I missing?

The secret to being a warrior wife lies in our perspective.

“It’s who we are, not a role we play!” ~ Dana James

When I see being a warrior wife as a job I need to do, it’s easy for me to let it slide on the days when I’m worn out or discouraged. It’s easy for me to call it “too hard.” But when I see being a warrior wife as part of my very identity, as a reflection of God’s character that comes not from trying harder, but from yielding to the Spirit, then I’m left with no excuses.

It is who I am called to be in Christ, and it’s who you are called to be in Christ, too, friend. Don’t leave your husband without the helper he really needs.

You were created for this and in Christ, you are equipped for this.

Let’s be warrior wives who fight the right kind of battles, not against our husbands, but for them.

Let’s do battle on our knees and in our war rooms against the real enemy.

Let’s choose to aid rather than to ignore.

Be an ezer. Fight!

Jen 🙂

~ This devotional is an excerpt from the book, Hope for the Hurting Wife by Rebekah Hallberg and Jen Stults.

*This post contains affiliate links. For more information on Being Confident of This’s affiliate policy, please visit the home page here. Thank you for helping to support this site!

Inspiration for this devotional came from Dana James’s talk “Being a Very Strong Helper” at Tranfsormed 2016 (Central Conference) and was used with permission from Dana. If you’d like to connect more with Dana, she writes at The Prime Rib, a website for minister’s wives in Tennessee.

For a practical take on how to encourage a discouraged husband (and how NOT to), try this one from Club 31 Women.

Recommended resources for being a warrior wife:

Sharing with: Grace and Truth

3 Ways to Calm Your Emotions ~ Before They Ruin Your Marriage

April 25, 2016 by jstults 5 Comments

Have you ever looked at your marriage and wondered what has happened? Have you been completely dissatisfied with the state of everything? Have you gone so far as to maybe even ponder divorce?

You’re not alone.

I know that as a culture, we tend to keep doing what we do, so long as it is beneficial to us in some way. But when we turn that corner where we feel it is no longer beneficial, we’re quick to throw it away – whether it’s an old book that our kids have outgrown, a faulty appliance, broken furniture, and even our marriage.

I wrote about the day I took my ring off, and I’ve been open with struggles in my own marriage. It’s hard to want to stay, to want to work things out, when the struggles seem too big.

Fear can play a major role in trying to work through our problems. We fear more pain, rejection, we even fear other people finding out about our troubles. Fear can truly mess us up in our day to day lives.

But there is something that can add fuel to fear’s fire and really make matters seem worse than they need to be.

Our emotions.

I’ve found that when my emotions run wild, the fear flares up. When the fear seems out of control, everything seems impossible. So to quiet the fear, I have to calm the emotions.

Here are 3 ways to calm your emotions.

1. REST

I’ve found that my emotions are the most difficult to control when I’m tired. No matter how hard I try to keep things in check, every little issue seems more magnified when I’m tired. I try to deny the tiredness and convince myself that the problem truly is just that big.

Lately I’ve gone back to intentionally lying down on a Sunday afternoon. I don’t always sleep, but I do intentionally give my body a bit of a break. Funny how we have to be so intentional about these things, isn’t it?

One time, early in my marriage, I was having trouble sleeping – or maybe adjusting to another body in the bed. My husband suggested sleeping with a Bible under my pillow, which I did. I was able to fall right to sleep and I slept very well. I’ve gone back to that practice from time to time, as the need presents itself. There’s something special about having God’s Word close to our minds while we sleep.

2. WORSHIP MUSIC

Ready for a bit of honesty here? This one is the hardest for me. Yup. This is where it becomes a battle of the will.

See, once I realize that my emotions are the problem, therefore, that I’m the problem (or at least a part of the problem), I don’t want to have to own up to it. I don’t want to be accountable for what I’ve contributed to the situation. I want to push the blame to anyone else.

It’s become a heart issue by this point – one that I don’t want to deal with.

I have to physically choose to turn on the music, put in the earbuds, and let God’s Word sink into my heart through worship songs.

I don’t have any particular favorites. It seems each time I listen, there are songs with lyrics geared specifically to what I need to hear. I love how God does that!

3. TIME WITH GOD

I often go to a favorite Scripture and just meditate on that. I read the verses around my favorites, to try to understand the context, to try to get a little more out of the passage. But I meditate on verses that have strengthened my heart previously, that have helped me find rest, that have provided the assurance that I need.

Just a few of my favorites:
Psalm 71:14, Jude 24-25, Revelation 12:11, Isaiah 61, Isaiah 43:1.

There are many others – I’d love to hear some of your favorite go-to verses for when you’re needing to refocus.

I have a few books that are easy-reading, that help me to rest and quiet my heart, but also remind me that my time right then is dedicated to focusing on God.

The first is called An Angel, A Miracle, or Simply God at Work? It’s the true stories of a missionary, shared in an easy-to-read manner. He shares the stories, shares God’s work through the stories, and leaves it up to you as to what you would call it – intervention from an angel? a true miracle? or simply God at work in our world today?

The next is called When Words Won’t Come and this one is rather new to me. I’m still reading through it, but I’ve been so blessed by it. The author provides a short Scripture and just a few, small thoughts to meditate on. This book has been a tremendous blessing on the days when I’ve faced difficulty or have struggled to keep going.

These 3 ways to calm your emotions are easy to do, but can provide so much heart-relief. There are plenty of other great ways to regain control of wild emotions – a walk, quiet time by a fire, a favorite hot drink on a cool evening, time talking with a friend.

I’ve found that once I quiet my emotions, then the fear settles and it’s easier to face the realities of the situation for what they are – not for the blown-out-of-proportion image that my emotions have made them to be.

I’d love to hear how you purposefully quiet your emotions to regain control of a seemingly out-of-control situation. I pray these 3 tips are a blessing to you!

Blessings!

-Rebekah

Rebekah has been completely overwhelmed by the grace and mercy of the Lord in her life. He has proven His faithfulness in every area of her life, especially in her marriage. She has come to understand the power of redemption and God’s work in her own marriage. Her goal is to be Sharing Redemption’s Stories – encouraging wives who are praying for redemption in their marriage.

Sharing with: Grace and Truth

The One Time You Want to Be a Fool

March 14, 2016 by jstults 10 Comments

I have a little confession to make: I am afraid to fail, to look a fool.

Recently I realized I’ve been afraid to get excited about our church plant opening in less than two weeks. Yes, me, a church planter’s wife. Afraid.

It all sounded so exciting back in the beginning and even leading up to the planning for our opening Sunday. But as the time draws nearer, I feel that familiar fear creeping up on me. What if we fail?

You know that fear, don’t you, friend?

Often we fear to take important steps forward in God’s plan for our lives because we might end up looking foolish if things don’t work out the way we think they will.

So we remain paralyzed, stuck.

I believe it’s the enemy’s favorite tactic when God’s people set out to serve and obey Him. If he can overwhelm us with fear, then maybe we’ll freeze in place or start stepping backwards instead of forwards. Maybe we’ll even turn around, tuck tail, and run like Jonah in the opposite direction.

Maybe we won’t want to be fools for Christ.

But what the enemy doesn’t want you to know is that no effort is wasted when it is done in the name of the Lord. There is no such thing as failure in God’s economy when we walk forward in obedience!

Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary. Gal. 6:9 NASB

Consider these biblical “fools for Christ”:

Abraham sacrificed security and uprooted his entire family with no final destination in mind, then became the father of nations.

While building the ark, Noah preached for 100 years with zero converts, but his family was saved.

Daniel spent the night in the lions’ den, risking death rather than giving up prayer and changed the law of the land. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego walked into a fiery furnace rather than bow to an idol and influenced the heart of the King of Babylon.

Mary faced a world of scorn for the miraculous conception of the child within her, yet she gave birth to the Son of God.

And consider Jesus, King of Kings and Lord of Lords, who had every right to strike his enemies dead rather than suffer on the cross for us. Even as he strained for breath, those around him taunted:

And the people stood by, looking on. And even the rulers were sneering at Him, saying, “He saved others; let Him save Himself if this is the Christ of God, His Chosen One.” Luke 23:35 NASB

If Christ Himself was willing to look the fool for laying down His own life, why are we so hesitant to do so when laying down ours?

Why am I afraid to look a fool for the sake of His call?

Pride.

My own stinkin’ pride.

I’m learning that I’ve got to get over that silly pride issue if I want to be an effective servant of the Lord. And you need to, also, friend.

This quote from recently departed Justice Scalia really speaks to me:

“God assumed from the beginning that the wise of the world would view Christians as fools … and he has not been disappointed. … If I have brought any message today, it is this: Have the courage to have your wisdom regarded as stupidity. Be fools for Christ. And have the courage to suffer the contempt of the sophisticated world.”

Pride is the enemy of Courage.

If we want to be courageous, we must be willing to put our pride at risk, yes?

Listen, friends, maybe we can’t all have the influence of men like Abraham or Justice Scalia, or women like Mary, but we can all be everyday fools for Christ.

We can be fools for Christ by…

choosing forgiveness when the world would hold onto anger
raising children God’s way even if those around us scoff
remaining in a wounded marriage when friends advise divorce
sacrificing time to live on mission right where we are
following Christ into ministry even though we feel inadequate
packing up and moving when He says to go
writing when God says write or speaking when led to speak even if we’ve never done it before

We can be fools for Christ in a million other ways by simply following Him moment by moment, day by day.

“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.” Jim Elliot

We can leave jobs, and homes, and families, and possessions, all for the sake of Christ and count it as gain! We can look naysayers in the eye and say with confidence, “I aim to follow the Lord – that’s the best I can do.”

“But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ…” Phil. 3:7-8 NASB

Don’t be afraid to lay down your life like a fool no matter what anyone else has to say about it because the rewards are both now and for eternity.

What is it that the Lord wants you to do for Him?

Will you follow no matter the cost?

Be fools for Christ!

Jen 🙂

Sharing with: Tell It To Me Tuesdays, Wholehearted Wednesdays, A Little R & R Wednesdays, Grace and Truth

Look to Jesus: A Review (and giveaway!)

February 9, 2016 by jstults 2 Comments

If someone asked me if I trust God, I’d most likely answer yes, but I haven’t always trusted God in every circumstance. In fact, during certain trials in my life when I felt I was drowning, trust seemed very hard to come by.

I’m certain I have more lessons in trust ahead of me, too.

That’s why Dawn Klinge’s new book Look to Jesus is so important. My friend Dawn recently shared with us about how trusting Jesus is related to the joy we experience, but her book delves even more deeply into the topic of trust.

Klinge’s suggestion to trust God by looking to Jesus sounds so simple on the surface, maybe too simple. However, Klinge takes the reader on a journey to discover how looking to Jesus through various seasons of life leads to a deepening trust, one not easily shaken.

Along the way, Klinge takes time to explain basic doctrines that even seasoned believers may not fully understand, such as the Trinity. I appreciate that the author lays this groundwork because if we don’t understand God’s character or how He operates, then we don’t really know God, do we?

And if we don’t really know Him, how can we trust Him?

In the first few chapters, Klinge rightly points out that we cannot generate trust on our own. She encourages the reader to understand this truth by using her own life experiences.

“I’ve never needed to literally walk on water. But I have had storms in my life. In some of those storms, I’ve kept my eyes on Jesus and in some, I’ve looked around at my circumstances and started to sink – and I’ve called out to Jesus and he has rescued me. He wants to do the same for you.” ~Dawn Klinge, Look to Jesus (pg. 31)

But my favorite part of the book takes place in Chapter 4, when Klinge gets down to the nnitty-gritty of how we become conformed to the image of Christ, yet she also makes an important distinction between legalism and grace. It’s this grace-filled approach which permeates the book that really resonates with me!

Throughout Look to Jesus, Klinge supports her own words with a wealth of Scripture as well as well-chosen quotes from other authors and famous people from all walks of life. The reader will appreciate how the author weaves all of this knowledge into her own story of learning to trust God.

Out of all of the quotes chosen, however, the Oswald Chamber’s quote on page 58 is my favorite because it falls right in line with the purpose of this blog. The point of our faith journey is the process – the work-in-progress of being remade into His image, moment by moment, day by day.

I always enjoy a reminder of my work-in-progress status! 🙂

Another favorite moment took place in Chapter 6 when Klinge speaks to trusting God when life is hard. I applaud Klinge for being brave enough to tackle this issue by sharing from her own pain. I also agree with the author on her conclusion that pain has a purpose, one we cannot realize if we try to deny the pain of a difficult season of life.

More than that, I respect that Klinge points the reader to the truth that Jesus understands human pain because He endured pain himself! Not only does he understand our pain, He wants to sit with us in the midst of it.

What I admire most about Look to Jesus is that any person who reads through the book will find a clear presentation of the gospel and what it means for us. In the final chapter, Klinge writes:

“Think of the high price God paid for you.

You are precious to Him and it doesn’t matter what you’ve done or how terribly you’ve failed – because it’s not about you. It’s about Christ in you. How could we possibly doubt that God would ever give up on us, ever fail us, when we consider what was done to earn our place in His family.” ~ Dawn Klinge, Look to Jesus (p.95)

What better way to close than to remind us that looking to Jesus, trusting God in every circumstance, is rooted in our identity in Christ. He who paid the price for us will not turn away in our times of need!

Although the tone of this book is more conversational in nature than some readers might be used to, the nuggets of truth throughout make it a good read for anyone.

If you haven’t already read Dawn’s book, I hope you’ll take the time to do so.I have no doubt you’ll find wisdom and encouragement that applies to your life.

And if you’d like a chance to win a free copy of Dawn’s book (PDF version), be sure to enter the giveaway below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You can also visit Dawn at her blog, Above the Waves, where she writes on life and faith.

Because of Him,

Jen 🙂

*A proof copy of this book was kindly provided to me by the author for purposes of review. However, all opinions are my own! Also, this post makes use of affiliate links. For more information on the affiliate links used by this blog, visit Being Confident of This’s homepage.
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Sharing with: Grace and Truth,

Learning to Recognize Progress Can Save Your Marriage

February 8, 2016 by jstults 1 Comment

Believe it or not, the whole fight started over a pile of clean laundry. We had just finished family fun night with our children, an evening of homemade, personalized pizzas and fun games and silly antics. After tucking the kids into bed, we were ready for some relaxation, some time to cuddle in front of our recent Netflix favorite.

But as we entered the bedroom, there it sat – a large pile of clean laundry just waiting to be folded.

I sighed.

I hadn’t meant to leave it there all day, but like most moms, I just got busy meeting all. the. needs. So there it sat, and as I flopped down to fold it, I spotted The Face, you know- the one that means your husband is a little miffed even if he doesn’t say anything.

Instead of following my better judgment and ignoring The Face, I immediately took offense.

Why in the world should he get mad at me – at least having laundry on the bed means that we actually have some clean laundry, which is no small feat after the week I’ve had! He should be happy that I managed to squeeze in a few loads here and there today. It’s not like I’m the only one in this house capable of folding laundry, anyways!

He should be thanking me!

Am I right, ladies?!

Of course, that line of self-righteous thinking led to an ill-timed argument, and what could have been a beautiful end to the day quickly degenerated into angry words and hurt feelings…

To find out how learning to recognize progress can save your marriage, join me over at my friend Becky’s blog for the rest of the story!

Sharing this with: Grace and Truth,

How Trusting Jesus Leads to Joy

January 15, 2016 by jstults Leave a Comment

Friends, I’m overjoyed to introduce you to my writer friend, Dawn Klinge, who blogs over at Above the Waves. Dawn has a new book that’s about to be released: Look To Jesus: How to Let Go of Worry and Trust God (coming January 26^th, 2016). Today she’s agreed to share some of what she has learned with us.

I’ve enjoyed and been encouraged by Dawn’s words countless times, so I’m sure this will be a treat for you all. Please make Dawn feel welcome by leaving her some encouraging comments.

…………………………………………..

What is your definition of joy? There’s one thing I know for sure; I want more of it. My definition of joy? That has been a bit harder for me to pin down.

The Bible has a lot to say about joy. The more I study the Word, the more I realize that joy is different than happiness. It’s a settled assurance, a quiet confidence, and a choice to trust God, no matter the circumstance. (Romans 15:13)

Joy is a fruit of the Spirit. “Putting on” a fruit of the Spirit, through our own efforts, was once described to me by a friend as being, “just as silly as gluing a piece of wax fruit to a tree and expecting it to taste just as good as the real thing”. The production of fruit starts at the root. The root of joy comes from trusting Jesus.

I was trying to put a definition on the word, joy. Then I read this verse (emphasis added)…

First Peter 1:8-9 “Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”

Joy is inexpressible and filled with glory. I take this to mean that joy is not something I’m going to be able to describe. It’s indescribable. Only those who trust in the Lord have this joy. If I want more joy, I need to, above all, seek Jesus. Joy will follow. That’s a promise.

We can use words like confidence, assurance, and glorious to describe joy- but we need to know that those descriptions barely skim the surface. Like a cold lake on a hot day, it’s best to jump in and experience it.

When we place our trust in Jesus, we will find joy. We will also continue to experience sorrow as long as we are on this side of Heaven. The two are inseparable. I love the way Kay Warren explains this in her book, Choose Joy: Because Happiness Isn’t Enough. She describes looking at train tracks into the brightness of the horizon,

“…the tracks become one. You can’t distinguish them as two separate tracks. That’s how it will be for us, too. One day, our parallel tracks of joy and sorrow will merge into one. The day we meet Jesus Christ in person and see the brightness of who he is, it will all come together for us. Then it will all make complete sense.”

I want joy, and I have found it, in following Jesus. When we say we want more joy, we can remember that He is where it’s found.

Jesus, we want more of you.

Dawn Klinge is the author of Look To Jesus: How to Let Go of Worry and Trust God (coming January 26^th, 2016). She writes about Christian faith regularly at Above the Waves, drawing on her experience as wife and mom to two. She holds a degree in education from University of Idaho. A pastor’s kid and a church girl her entire life, she’s still trying to figure out what it looks like to put her trust in Jesus. Dawn and her husband, Derek, live near Seattle, Washington. You can also find her on Facebook and Instagram.

We Are Family: Building a Strong Family Unit

January 6, 2016 by jstults 3 Comments

Most people I know would love to be part of a strong family unit, one that stays together and loves each other no matter what life brings, a family in which each member feels loved and valued.

But building that kind of family dynamic doesn’t always come easy.

As a family in ministry, we’ve been exposed to a variety of family dynamics over the years. Some families are very good at building bonds that keep them together while other families barely remain intact, and still others struggle with dysfunction for generations.

No one sets out to raise an unhealthy and unhappy child or family, but many do so by default.

So what makes the difference between families that thrive and those that fail?

Why do some families seem more close-knit than others?

What can we do to keep our family strong?

We’ll be exploring these questions and answers over the next few weeks here at Being Confident of This in a series called We Are Fa-mi-ly. Topics will range from building a family identity to keeping teens in the family, and more.

Follow along as we discuss God’s marvelous gift of family!

Characteristics of a Strong Family

If we want a family that thrives, we’d do well to examine the characteristics of a strong family. So earlier this week, I asked our four children (ages 6 to 15) what makes a good family.

Here are their responses:

belief in God (several mentioned this)
hugs and affection
enjoying time together
doing things together (several mentioned this)
helping each other
sharing with each other
loving each other (several mentioned this)
trust and honesty
talking to each other

Then I asked them (and my husband) what we could do to improve our family, and they answered:

more family time, especially game night (that’s their fav!)
consistent family devotions
share more responsibility for our home
complain less
use kind speech with siblings

I think their answers give a pretty accurate picture of our family. We really do have fun together, and faith in Jesus Christ is very important to us. But we certainly aren’t without flaws. 🙂

If you want to know how to improve your family, consider asking your spouse and children what the family does well and what you could be doing better?

An even better source to consider is God’s Word.

4 Biblical Characteristics of a Strong Family

From the beginning of mankind, God intended to use the family unit in a special way. So, one of His first commands to Adam and Eve was “be frutiful and multiply.” (Gen. 1:28)

We can see that families have had a special place in God’s heart from the very beginning!

1. A strong family begins with a healthy, God-centered marriage.

In Ephesians (5:25), we see that the relationship between a husband and wife reflects the very nature of God’s love for and pursuit of His people. Children learn much about both human love and God’s love from the relationship they witness between their parents.

2. A strong family maintains a proper relationship between parent and child.

One of the ten commandments speaks to this very relationship:

“Honor your father and mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you.” Ex. 20:12 (NASB)

In a healthy family unit, parents love their children and because they love them, they discipline and instruct them.

Both the marriage relationship and the parent-child relationship serve to help children understand aspects of God’s character: Christ as the bridegroom and God as our Heavenly Father.

“See how great a love the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called the children of God…” 1 Jn. 3:1a (NASB)

When either one of these key relationships is damaged, a child’s understanding of God’s character easily becomes skewed.

This is why building a strong family is paramount in today’s society. The more dysfunctional family units grow, the less society understands God’s true character!

3. A strong family teaches future generations about the history of God’s relationship with His people.

Even more, a healthy family will pass down the record of how God has worked in their own family, too!

“Only give heed to yourself and keep your soul diligently, so that you do not forget the things which your eyes have seen and they do not depart from your heart all the days of your life; but make them known to your sons and grandsons.” Deut. 4:9 (NASB)

4. A strong family puts on love.

The best families are those that just ooze with love and make the rest of us jealous, right? 🙂 However, as flawed humans, we are not capable of loving one another perfectly all of the time.

We all have those tense moments when feelings trump truth or miscommunication leads to unnecessary wounds, but a strong family learns to work through those tough times. A strong family learns to embrace the work-in-progress of loving and forgiving one another.

“Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Eph. 4:32 (NASB)

We could probably list several more characteristics of strong families, but these four are foundational.

I’m willing to bet most parents desire to leave a legacy of strong family bonds for future generations, but a quick look at the world around us demonstrates that such a legacy does not happen by chance.

As mom to a soon-to-be sixteen-year-old, I recognize that the time is all too short. These formative years fly by more and more quickly, and if we’re not careful, we’ll miss out on important opportunities.

We must be intentional in building family bonds that last!

Join us here for the next installment in the We Are Fa-mi-ly series for some practical ways to strengthen your family.

Until then, put on love!

Jen 🙂

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Merry Christmas and My Final Grace and Truth

December 25, 2015 by jstults Leave a Comment

Merry Christmas, friends!

As I mentioned last week, this will be my final week as a co-host for Grace and Truth, but I encourage you to link up in the New Year with one of the other co-hosts.

I’ll still be here blogging away and joining with you all in the link-up!

Thank you for your faithfulness,

Jen 🙂

Grace & Truth : A Weekly Christian Link Up

Grace & Truth exists to point people to Jesus! We hope this link-up will be a source of encouragement each and every week. If you’re a blogger our hope is that you’ll use this space as a way to meet new friends within the Christian blogging community. If you’re a reader our hope is that you’ll meet new bloggers that love Jesus just as much as you do! Most of all, we hope you’ll meet Jesus here.

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Satisfaction Through Christ
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A Divine Encounter
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The Spiritual Landmine Set-up

Fear not.

Philippians 1:6 Printable from me

I become task-oriented rather than people-oriented, a slave to the to-do list rather than a Spirit-led woman.

Thus, ezer refers to the warrior aspect of God’s character – the One who fights on our behalf, our Shield and Defender, our Rescue.

The secret to being a warrior wife lies in our perspective.

You were created for this and in Christ, you are equipped for this.

Recommended resources for being a warrior wife:

Here are 3 ways to calm your emotions.

Consider these biblical “fools for Christ”:

Pride is the enemy of Courage.

…………………………………………..

Characteristics of a Strong Family

4 Biblical Characteristics of a Strong Family

1. A strong family begins with a healthy, God-centered marriage.

2. A strong family maintains a proper relationship between parent and child.

3. A strong family teaches future generations about the history of God’s relationship with His people.

4. A strong family puts on love.

We must be intentional in building family bonds that last!

Meet Your Hosts

Satisfaction Through Christ BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER |G+

Kaylene Yoder BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

The Brown Tribe BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Arabah Joy BLOG | FACEBOOK | TWITTER | PINTEREST | G+

A Divine Encounter BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | G+ | STUMBLEUPON

Being Confident of This BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Busy Being Blessed BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Sharing Redemption’s Stories BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

In order to be featured next week:

Grab A Button

**Thus, ezer refers to the warrior aspect of God’s character – the One who fights on our behalf, our Shield and Defender, our Rescue.**

Satisfaction Through Christ
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER |G+

Kaylene Yoder
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

The Brown Tribe
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Arabah Joy
BLOG | FACEBOOK | TWITTER | PINTEREST | G+

A Divine Encounter
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | G+ | STUMBLEUPON

Being Confident of This
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Busy Being Blessed
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+

Sharing Redemption’s Stories
BLOG | FACEBOOK | PINTEREST | TWITTER | G+