• Home
  • About the Work in Progress
  • Confident Faith
    • Christianity
    • Women of Faith
    • Weight Loss Journey
  • Confident Marriage
    • Marriage
    • Marriage Resources for Christians
  • Confident Parenting
    • Parenting
  • Confident Blogging
    • Blogging
    • Favorite Link-ups
  • Work with Me
    • Graphic Design
  • FREE Resource Library

Being Confident Of This

Grace for the work-in-progress woman

When Your Feelings Deceive You

May 15, 2019 by jstults 2 Comments

I entered the large waiting room with my family in tow. We knew it would be a long wait, so we brought games with us to play. Unfortunately, we couldn’t find an open spot to set up camp.

Just as I found a table that would work for us, a woman came and began to take it apart, feeding its pieces to the flames in the nearby fireplace.

At first I felt shocked, but then anger and frustration quickly followed. It seemed we faced obstacles in every direction we turned.

To top it all off, as I looked for a space to settle in, my phone and my mom’s computer went missing – stolen while my back was turned!

I stormed around the waiting room, looking for the culprit and managed to find my mom’s computer …  just before my alarm woke me.

A sigh of relief.

It was just a dream, and boy was I ever thankful!

Yet even as I walked through our morning routine, I felt the lingering effects of the bad dream. Frustration and anger clung to me even as I dropped our children off at school. I knew what happened in my dream wasn’t real, but my feelings weren’t catching up to reality!

The truth is, my feelings often get the best of me!

Exercising self-discipline over my emotions is still a work-in-progress area for me. I tend to be an over-reactor with big emotions that often feel overwhelming. But the truth is, as a follower of Christ, I have everything I need to boss my feelings around instead of letting them boss me. So do you, friend!

My weird dream was just the reminder I needed – my feelings lie to me, and your feelings deceive you, too, friend.

The fact that our emotions don’t always reflect reality is scientific.

Did you know your emotions can hijack the function of your brain? You can literally be deceived by your own feelings!

When we find ourselves in what we perceive to be a fight-or-flight situation, our internal “alarm system” essentially overrides our ability to think clearly. According to this article, your feelings deceive you most often when the powerful emotion of fear comes into play.

We’ve all experienced this truth for ourselves, even if a situation isn’t as dire as a fight-or-flight problem. We know our feelings, whether good or bad, tend to linger. Sometimes they linger long past their welcome!

Recall the last time you argued with your spouse or a loved one. Even after resolving the situation, often sadness follows. How about the last time you watched a scary movie; were you just a bit more jumpy than normal when turning out the lights for bed? Or think about the last time you enjoyed some really great quality time with people you care about – the good feelings linger, too, don’t they?

Just as with my dream above, we can easily get worked up or upset about things that aren’t even true! Your feelings deceive you more often than you realize.

That’s why the Bible cautions us to guard our hearts and to avoid trusting in our own wisdom and emotions.

Your feelings lie to you – that fact isn’t just scientific, it’s also biblical!

When God created man and woman, he created us in His image, which means we have a spirit, a mind/will, and also emotions.

Our emotions are an important part of life here on earth – they bring us joy and purpose, while also serving to protect us from danger and harm.Yet our feelings can be tricky to interpret, and even more dangerous to trust.

In our current culture, feelings have become king. We hear many phrases that encourage us to fully embrace our tricky emotions:

  • “Follow your heart”
  • “Do what makes you happy”
  • “Find your best life”
  • “Just be yourself”

The problem with elevating our feelings and emotions to the point of “absolute truth” is that our human bodies, and therefore emotions, are hopelessly flawed!

Ever since Adam and Eve chose to break the one rule they were given because they falsely believed they knew best, humankind has been prone wander from what’s best. We consistently choose our “truth” over our Creator God’s omniscient Truth!

The Bible makes our tendency to wander very clear:

The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time. Genesis 6:5

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. Galatians 5:16-17 (NIV)

According to this scripture, by nature our flesh wants the opposite of what the Spirit wants. We cannot follow our own desires if we truly want to be Spirit-filled women of God!

To focus our minds on the human nature leads to death, but to focus our minds on the Spirit leads to life and peace. Romans 8:6 (NIV)

There is a way that appears to be right,
but in the end it leads to death.
Even in laughter the heart may ache,
and rejoicing may end in grief. Proverbs 14:12-23 (NIV)

Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered. Proverbs 28:26 (ESV)

Romans and Proverbs agree that what seems right to sinful man, leads to death. Proverbs also points out how finicky our emotions are, too. Trusting our emotions seems to be a risky business!

The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9 (NIV)

Even Jeremiah agrees that our hearts are deceitful and difficult to understand.

My work-in-progress friend, don’t be deceived by your feelings. Don’t elevate emotions above the truth of God’s Word, even if the culture around you encourages you to do so!

Choose instead to give God’s Word the proper place of authority in your life, and you will reap all the benefits of a life lived according to the Word!

Do your feelings boss you around? Or do you boss them? Learn the biblical way to dealing with difficult emotions! #emotions #christianwomen #biblestudy #confidentfaith Being Confident of This | overcoming emotions | how to deal with emotions | Christian women and feelings | heart is deceptive | why Christian women can't trust our feelings | what the Bible says about emotions | depression | fear | anxiety | anger | confusion | confidence | hope | peace | encouragement for Christian women

5 Christian Responses to Difficult Feelings and Emotions

If trusting in our own feelings and wisdom is really trusting in the flesh, then how should a Christian woman rightly respond?

  1. Scripture encourages us to guard our hearts.

We must be careful what we take in, much like words of the childhood song tell us “Oh, be careful little eyes what you see..”

Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

The more we think on things above, rather than earthly things (including our own feelings), the more we will be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2)! When your feelings deceive you, examine the diet of your life – what are you taking in that may be contributing to negative feelings?

2. When struggling with your feelings, ask God to search your heart and reveal the truth to you.

Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24 (NIV)

God is faithful! He has given us the Holy Spirit to guide us. We must be aware that our perception is often tainted, but we must be equally aware that our God is greater.

3. Be aware of the Accuser and His power play for your feelings!

Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Messiah. For the accuser of our brothers and sisters, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. Revelation 12:10 (NIV)

Satan is often referred to as the accuser. He loves to prey on our emotions and make us feel condemned. He desires to make us slaves to perfectionism and the kind of religious living that focuses on the outward rather than the inward. He is the great deceiver, eager to find our weak places.

Scripture teaches us to resist the Devil (James 4:7), and Jesus showed us we can do so using the truth we find in scripture (Matthew 4:1-11)!

4. Rather than trusting in your own heart, emotions, and understanding, place your ultimate trust safely in God’s hands.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

Your feelings deceive you, but God has the power to make your way straight. All it requires, according to this scripture is submission to Him!

5. Let God’s truth boss your feelings around!

Remember if you are “in Christ,” you have been given a totally new nature (2 Corinthians 5:17)! Not only are you new in Him, but you also have direct access to His throne, meaning you can pray with full confidence! (Hebrews 4:16, 10:19) Don’t let your feelings deceive you into thinking life is too hard or too scary, or that you’re all alone.

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 NIV)

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)

The new spirit God gave us is not one of fear, friend! According to the verses above, we have all that we need to walk in the Spirit – power, love, and self-discipline. We also have a God who cares about even that which seems insignificant. He wants us to come to Him with our cares and anxieties!

Let me leave you with this final scripture prayer today:

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13 (NIV)

The next time you struggle with difficult emotions, choose to respond in the Spirit rather than in the flesh. Look to the One who made you, the Author and Perfecter of your faith. Believe what His Word says is true!

Don’t let your feelings deceive you, friend.

Jen 🙂

Our emotions can get the best of us if we let them. Do you struggle with difficult emotions like fear, anxiety, insecurity, anger, and so forth? Learn what the Bible says about overcoming our feelings! #biblestudyforwomen #abundantlife #biblicalemotions Being Confident of This | dealing with emotions biblically | what the Bible says | christian growth | confident christian women | overcoming fear | biblical way to deal wth anxiety | how to get past grief | bible lesson on anger | encouragement for godly women | guarding your heart

 

Filed Under: Christianity Tagged With: Anger, anxiety, Bible study, Christian living, christian response to emotions, deceived by your feelings, depression, difficult emotions, Emotions, feelings, Trust, what to do with feelings

Look to Jesus: A Review (and giveaway!)

February 9, 2016 by jstults 2 Comments

If someone asked me if I trust God, I’d most likely answer yes, but I haven’t always trusted God in every circumstance.  In fact, during certain trials in my life when I felt I was drowning, trust seemed very hard to come by.

I’m certain I have more lessons in trust ahead of me, too.

That’s why Dawn Klinge’s new book Look to Jesus is so important.  My friend Dawn recently shared with us about how trusting Jesus is related to the joy we experience, but her book delves even more deeply into the topic of trust.

Klinge’s suggestion to trust God by looking to Jesus sounds so simple on the surface, maybe too simple. However, Klinge takes the reader on a journey to discover how looking to Jesus through various seasons of life leads to a deepening trust, one not easily shaken.

Along the way, Klinge takes time to explain basic doctrines that even seasoned believers may not fully understand, such as the Trinity.  I appreciate that the author lays this groundwork because if we don’t understand God’s character or how He operates, then we don’t really know God, do we?

And if we don’t really know Him, how can we trust Him?

In the first few chapters, Klinge rightly points out that we cannot generate trust on our own.  She encourages the reader to understand this truth by using her own life experiences.

“I’ve never needed to literally walk on water. But I have had storms in my life. In some of those storms, I’ve kept my eyes on Jesus and in some, I’ve looked around at my circumstances and started to sink – and I’ve called out to Jesus and he has rescued me. He wants to do the same for you.” ~Dawn Klinge, Look to Jesus (pg. 31)

But my favorite part of the book takes place in Chapter 4, when Klinge gets down to the nnitty-gritty of how we become conformed to the image of Christ, yet she also makes an important distinction between legalism and grace.  It’s this grace-filled approach which permeates the book that really resonates with me!

Dawn Klinge's new book, Look to Jesus, gently leads the reader to an understanding of how to trust God even during the painful trials of life.  Read here for a review and enter for your chance to win a copy of this new release!

Throughout Look to Jesus, Klinge supports her own words with a wealth of Scripture as well as well-chosen quotes from other authors and famous people from all walks of life. The reader will appreciate how the author weaves all of this knowledge into her own story of learning to trust God.

Out of all of the quotes chosen, however, the Oswald Chamber’s quote on page 58 is my favorite because it falls right in line with the purpose of this blog. The point of our faith journey is the process – the work-in-progress of being remade into His image, moment by moment, day by day.

I always enjoy a reminder of my work-in-progress status! 🙂

Another favorite moment took place in Chapter 6 when Klinge speaks to trusting God when life is hard.  I applaud Klinge for being brave enough to tackle this issue by sharing from her own pain.  I also agree with the author on her conclusion that pain has a purpose, one we cannot realize if we try to deny the pain of a difficult season of life.

More than that, I respect that Klinge points the reader to the truth that Jesus understands human pain because He endured pain himself!  Not only does he understand our pain, He wants to sit with us in the midst of it.

What I admire most about Look to Jesus is that any person who reads through the book will find a clear presentation of the gospel and what it means for us. In the final chapter, Klinge writes:

“Think of the high price God paid for you.

You are precious to Him and it doesn’t matter what you’ve done or how terribly you’ve failed – because it’s not about you. It’s about Christ in you.  How could we possibly doubt that God would ever give up on us, ever fail us, when we consider what was done to earn our place in His family.” ~ Dawn Klinge, Look to Jesus (p.95)

What better way to close than to remind us that looking to Jesus, trusting God in every circumstance, is rooted in our identity in Christ.  He who paid the price for us will not turn away in our times of need!

Dawn Klinge's new book, Look to Jesus, gently leads the reader to an understanding of how to trust God even during the painful trials of life.  Read here for a review and enter for your chance to win a copy of this new release!

Although the tone of this book is more conversational in nature than some readers might be used to, the nuggets of truth throughout make it a good read for anyone.

If you haven’t already read Dawn’s book, I hope you’ll take the time to do so.I have no doubt you’ll find wisdom and encouragement that applies to your life.

And if you’d like a chance to win a free copy of Dawn’s book (PDF version), be sure to enter the giveaway below!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You can also  visit Dawn at her blog, Above the Waves, where she writes on life and faith.

Because of Him,

Jen 🙂

*A proof copy of this book was kindly provided to me by the author for purposes of review. However, all opinions are my own!  Also, this post makes use of affiliate links. For more information on the affiliate links used by this blog, visit Being Confident of This’s homepage.

Sharing with: Grace and Truth,

Filed Under: Christianity Tagged With: Biblical truth, book review, Christian living, Doubt, Encouragement, Faith, Look to Jesus, Trust, work in progress, Worry

How to Trust God With Your Marriage

August 15, 2015 by jstults 3 Comments

Sometimes trusting God with your marriage is just plain hard!  Our men go through tough times and so do we.  Maybe there has been a breach of trust, or maybe you’re both caught in the midst of a painful trial.

Maybe you’ve simply grown apart.

Whatever the case may be, trusting our husbands isn’t always foremost in our minds.

The hard part about being married to an imperfect man is that we are called to trust him and submit to him anyways, even:

  • When he forgets to pay bills
  • When he breaks a promise
  • When he grows depressed
  • When he acts irresponsibly
  • When he acts unloving
  • When he runs from God like Jonah

Failing to trust your husband is really failing to trust God. Hard to hear? Yes, I know.  Read here to find out how to trust God with  your marriage!

Do you find that challenging?

Because I certainly do!

When I see evidence that my husband is really struggling in his faith and not walking well with the Lord, I begin to question his judgement and leadership for our family.

Are you frustrated by failure you in your marriage? Do you wonder if there is any hope left for you? Hope for the Hurting Wife is a 30 day devotional journey written by two women who survived the muck and mire of marriage problems. Christian marriage|difficult marriage|encouragement for wives|hope for marriage|should I get a divorce|how to stay married| healthy marriage|trusting God with marriage|wife|husband|christian woman

That slippery slope of distrust quickly leads straight to disrespect if I don’t catch it in time.

How to Trust God with Your Marriage

Join me over at my friend Starla’s place for the rest of this piece on learning to trust God by trusting our husbands!  It’s my contribution to her awesome 31 Days of Trusting God series. 🙂

Click the picture below to read!

Failing to trust your husband is really failing to trust God. It's a hard pill to swallow sometimes, I know!  Read here to learn how to trust God with your marriage!

Filed Under: Marriage Tagged With: Christian living, Christian Marriage, Christian Women, how to trust, Husband, Marriage, Trust, trust my husband, Wife

The Loft – Talking About Trust

September 15, 2014 by stultsmamaof4 4 Comments

The Loft is open, come on up!

 

The Loft: A weekly Hangout and Link Up for Christian bloggers
Graphic by Kerry Messer

 

About #TheLoft

 

The Loft is the place for conversation, community, networking, and Christian growth.

Each week we provide a topic to start the conversation.

 

PLEASE NOTE: We want to foster community and transparent conversation with one another, just like we’d do if we were meeting in real life. So we ask that your link stick to the weekly topic and that you mention The Loft in your post. Thank you so much!


Monday night, at 9pm Eastern, the linky goes live and all week you can link up your post on that week’s topic.

We’ll have fun topics, serious topics, practical, soul-ful, holiday, and so, so much more…we can’t wait to get started! This is not only a great way to connect with others, it’s also a fun and easy way to establish a writing habit. If you aren’t a blogger, you are welcome to join in by leaving your comments in the comment section.

So grab your coffee mug and come on up! Hang out for a bit. We betcha you’ll be glad you did.

 

To Participate:

 

1. Be creative. Feel free to use words, photos, video, audio, your family pet, whatever, to communicate on the weekly topic. But please stick to the weekly topic 🙂

2. Listen twice as much as you talk. If you leave one link, visit two. Trust us on this one~wink.

3. Be a community. Include #TheLoft graphic and/or link back in your post so we can find each other. Also, share the great stuff you find when you visit around…we’ll be doing the same.

 

The Loft Link Up

 

When you link up at The Loft, your link will appear on 5 blogs! We’d love for you to visit The Loft co-hosts and know who we are:

Leah
Kathy
Arabah
Jen
Rebekah

 

 

Now it’s time to link up!

 

This Week’s Topic: “Trust” (Opening another can of worms here, but let’s go there anyway~ wink. Is trust hard for you? Why or why not? What area are you struggling to trust God in? What have you learned about trust? The floor is open!)

Next Week’s Topic: “Best Practical Tip” (What is the best advice you’ve ever received? Or given? What one thing do you want to make sure you pass on to your children, friends, or family? It can be about homemaking, marriage, relationship with Jesus, anything… 🙂 )

 

Add Your Link Here:

Filed Under: Christianity, Uncategorized, Women of Faith Tagged With: #TheLoft, Christian growth, community, Faith, Trust

Hi, I'm Jen: a work in progress. I'm imperfect - a mom of four, pastor's wife, discipler, and sinner saved only by grace. I like to sing, read, write, teach, and smile. I have a heart for encouraging women everywhere to understand God's limitless love for them and what His grace means for everyday living. Welcome! :) Read More…

Contact Me

jstults[at]beingconfidentofthis[dot]com

Reader Favorites:

  • Why Reading Isn't Enough ~ Study the Bible
    Why Reading Isn't Enough ~ Study the Bible
  • My Favorite Life-changing Books
    My Favorite Life-changing Books
  • For the Wife Who's Not in Love Anymore
    For the Wife Who's Not in Love Anymore
  • When Your Feelings Deceive You
    When Your Feelings Deceive You
  • Choosing Mary Moments in a Martha World
    Choosing Mary Moments in a Martha World
  • 3 Ways to Fight for Joy in a Difficult Marriage
    3 Ways to Fight for Joy in a Difficult Marriage
  • Top Ten Educational Websites for Kids
    Top Ten Educational Websites for Kids
  • The Secret to Being a Warrior Wife
    The Secret to Being a Warrior Wife

Join the facebook page for everyday encouragement!

Join the facebook page for everyday encouragement!

Share This Blog:

Facebook Twitter More...

Follow Me on Pinterest

Visit Jen's profile on Pinterest.
Hope for the Hurting Wife: 30 Days of Practical Encouragement for Your Marriage.   marriage book|difficult marriage|husband|wife|hard times in marriage|marriage encouragement

Categories

New devotional release from Jen Stults - Being Confident of This: 30 Days to Discovering Your Identity in Christ. This book is for every Christian woman who wants to walk in confident faith instead of struggling with doubt, fear, and insecurity! self-esteem | self-confidence | self-help | motivational | personal growth | spiritual growth | how to be more confident | Christian women | devotional | Bible study | identity in Christ | superwoman myth | being like Mary

Copyright © 2025 | Crave Theme by The Pixelista | Built on the Genesis Framework