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Being Confident Of This

Grace for the work-in-progress woman

An Interview With the Author of Love Idol {and a chance to win!}

April 3, 2014 by stultsmamaof4 Leave a Comment

Each Thursday for the next few weeks, we are talking about breaking free from insecurity, comparison, and shame. We are sharing our raw and messy real life stories. But also, more importantly, we are sharing the truths that set us free. We have bathed this series in prayer and ask now that the Father knit our hearts together and strengthen us to slay this giant called “insecurity” in our hearts.

Verdict on Value

 

As part of our “Verdict on Value” series, today we have the privilege of interviewing Jennifer Dukes Lee and giving away a copy of her brand new book, Love Idol: Letting Go of Your Need for Approval – and Seeing Yourself through God’s Eyes

Here is a snippet of the interview, which you can read in it’s entirety here. Here’s Jennifer:

“Approval is a powerful force in our world. We want to be loved, and liked, and known and validated. And sometimes, we want all that from people – more than we want it from God.

I have struggled with feelings of inadequacy since I was a child – even though I was a perfectionist child with the As to prove it. I had always hoped that my good performances would fill the desire for significance and value. I wanted the approval of parents, peers, and pastors – of everyone.

Retraining my heart would take years. But I knew it was worth the fight – not only for me, but for our daughters. Children are mirrors, reflecting what they see in us. I’ll never forget one Thanksgiving several years ago. I found one of the girls crying in the corner of a bedroom. She had drawn a self-portrait and labeled the parts: “Boring brown hair. Stupid glasses. Dumb freckles. Bad teeth.” She had scrawled across the top of the paper: UGLY.

So many of us – as girls – feel like we’re never enough. And we grow up into women who feel the same way.

I sat on the floor next to my daughter that afternoon and held her for a long time. I vowed that I would provide a firm foundation for my girls to know that a woman’s identity is found in Christ alone. But I would need to live that truth out. I would need to model my Christ-identity.

My girls and I started saying these words out loud: “We’ve had enough of the not-enoughs.”

I started journaling my experiences, writing on my blog, and speaking about the issue of approval. On paper, I could see how my life had become a long journey of seeking approval in the classroom, the corporate cubicle, and my own family tree. After talking with women across the country, I’ve learned that my journey is every woman’s journey – even though the details of our stories differ.”

Click here to read the entire interview and a chance to win Jennifer’s just released book!

 

 

Be sure to catch all of the posts in our Verdict on Value series:

March 27th – Kathy from Free to Fly (Approval)

April 3rd – Interview with Jennifer Dukes Lee (and a chance to win her new book, Love Idol!)

April 10th – Kerry from Plenty Place (Reputation)

April 17th – Arabah from Arabah Joy (Shame ~with a free printable)

April 24th – Jen from Being Confident of This (Confidence)

May 1st – Leah from The Point (Insecurity)

May 8th – Wrap up at Arabah Joy’s place

 

 

Filed Under: Christianity, Uncategorized, Women of Faith Tagged With: approval, Identity in Christ, Jennifer Duke's Lee, Love Idol, self-worth, Verdict on Value Series

Kathy’s Story

March 27, 2014 by stultsmamaof4 2 Comments

Each Thursday for the next few weeks, we are talking about breaking free from insecurity, comparison, and shame. We are sharing our raw and messy real life stories. But also, more importantly, we are sharing the truths that set us free. We have bathed this series in prayer and ask now that the Father knit our hearts together and strengthen us to slay this giant called “insecurity” in our hearts.

Verdict on Value

 

Starting the day with weariness, I was on my way into the church parking lot when the thought crossed my mind: “life is war.” And then, “if we for a moment put our sword down and pretend like it isn’t, we begin to lose ground.”

There are times we feel like we can’t win and want to just ‘get out’ of the fight.

I’m not talking about the wars we hear of on the daily news, the battles our soldiers fight on land with guns and tanks . . .

I’m talking about our personal wars. Life’s daily struggles.

We fight to maintain schedules, to make deadlines, to control our eating, to get to the gym, to give when we’d rather hoard, to be kind when we are under pressure, to cook and serve another meal, the list goes on and on.

But here is what I think is the crux of it all: The core battle is the one fought in our souls for our identity. I’ve written about the soul-hole, how we are born with a cavern that needs to be filled with love and only God’s perfect love can complete us.

Though we know that, we don’t always live it. Often, I think it is because we don’t know how to fight. We think we have to fight for validation, but we already have it. Christ who came to redeem us from the curse of broken identity has already validated us. We don’t fight for victory, we fight from it.

His cross proclaims, “It is finished.” {Your search for value ends HERE!} “I passionately love you!!!”

In this series we want to explore how to walk in victory, to teach what we have learned and to learn from one another. The battle won’t cease until we are done with this life and completely free from our old skin. But we have been given what we need to stay the course while we are here.

Click here to finish reading Kathy’s story

 

 

Be sure to catch all of the posts in our Verdict on Value series:

March 27th – Kathy from Free to Fly (Approval)

April 3rd – Interview with Jennifer Dukes Lee (and a chance to win her new book, Love Idol!)

April 10th – Kerry from Plenty Place (Reputation)

April 17th – Arabah from Arabah Joy (Shame ~with a free printable)

April 24th – Jen from Being Confident of This (Confidence)

May 1st – Leah from The Point (Insecurity)

May 8th – Wrap up at Arabah Joy’s place

 

 

Filed Under: Christianity, Uncategorized, Women of Faith Tagged With: acceptance, approval, Christ-centered living, Identity in Christ, Verdict on your value series

Hi, I'm Jen: a work in progress. I'm imperfect - a mom of four, pastor's wife, discipler, and sinner saved only by grace. I like to sing, read, write, teach, and smile. I have a heart for encouraging women everywhere to understand God's limitless love for them and what His grace means for everyday living. Welcome! :) Read More…

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New devotional release from Jen Stults - Being Confident of This: 30 Days to Discovering Your Identity in Christ. This book is for every Christian woman who wants to walk in confident faith instead of struggling with doubt, fear, and insecurity! self-esteem | self-confidence | self-help | motivational | personal growth | spiritual growth | how to be more confident | Christian women | devotional | Bible study | identity in Christ | superwoman myth | being like Mary

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